Today, as much as he wanted to be very productive, he seems rather weak. Having fluid drained takes a lot of someone it seems, and even though he's stopped, the body still needs time to recover. I can only imagine the frustration he's had going through these past few days. When I had to be readmitted twice to the hospital following surgery, I was really upset. For him, he's been doing amazing two months, almost three, after surgery. Here it is that now he seems to go through the mind over body experience in that he realizes, as much as you want to do something with this new heart, it might take a little longer than you want, to start going full speed ahead.
For the first time in a long time, I attempted to do situps on my yoga ball. Sadly I'm still feeling the strain of my sternum being cut in half at the very bottom. I want to get back into the shape I once had and I blame myself for sometimes not being motivated enough to exercise regularly. The motivation I have currently, is my 24th birthday is in less than a month, and soon after, my 1 year since open heart. I really can't believe it's going to be a year. I want more time I think to accomplish some things I haven't yet achieved. So, it's time to get cracking. I need to move forward with my life. Surgery just was one chapter of hopefully a long life ahead. My heart health however, is something I need to work on daily. I may have a disease that at times scares me, but I cannot be afraid to live and make strides to being a better overall person. Time does not stop for anyone.
Whether it is big or small, we cannot let the challenges of life overtake us.
Life isn't worth living if we cannot defeat our own demons and move forward.
One single step is all it takes.
<3
Jess
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